Emergence

 

https://youtu.be/UDVtMYqUAyw

From the Movie, "Interstellar"  

We stare at one another, You and I.  I've come to the conclusion that I've always known You because  you've always been here,  neatly and safely tucked away inside me.

At an early age I learned of your presence but because I wasn't ready to confront the truth of what You had to tell me, I kept you locked up and imprisoned.

In this way I didn't have to experience how You made me feel, how You were able to unearth so many hurtful memories and feelings, bringing them to the surface, that at the time I was unable to, I couldn't and didn't want to deal with.       

And yet it was all because of You, because You knew in order for me to heal and become whole, I would eventually have to turn and face them.    

This, I learned, after many years of walking this earth.    Thank You. 

I have found that your persistence, your emergence was all about awakening that part of me that needed awakening in order to heal, that part of me I've kept hidden for so long.  

In my feeblest moments, in my darkest moments, in my weakest moments in which I let my guard down with you, You, My Shadow Self,  would appear like fine tobacco smoke, slowly turning and twisting through the still air, watching me as I was watching you in my solitary repose, a smokey grey and benign apparition hovering over me.

I would recline in my easy chair and watch You, trying to figure You out, your next move, cigarette in hand and a glass of red wine in the other while you probed me, teased me, challenged me and in an effort to get my attention, flirted and danced over my head.

I never really liked how You made me feel though, as you were capable of dredging up long held, deep seated, repressed and hurtful emotions.  And yet, through the years, I came to realize You were not to blame nor to be feared but to be welcomed, as Your emerging presence meant I was finally on the road to healing.

I was no longer afraid to confront my inner demons but eager to do so and to hell with the world!  I am who I am and know now I am a masterpiece in the making, as WE All ARE.

    ~I am home.
          I found myself.
               I am loved.
                     I am wanted.
                         I am worthy.
                              I have purpose.
                                    I Am Whole.~

Mission Accomplished
~Interstellar~