Friday, February 17, 2017

Ouch!


It's curious how thin skinned we are; how close to the surface our real self is (our soul) and how we  can sometimes connect with it, and rather painfully, and with little or no warning.  Yesterday I received an earful pertaining to what a real family is, according to this individual and the sorry fact that ours was not.    Now this was news to me but obviously something they wanted to get off their chest.  I was doing a tarot reading for this person and do honestly believe that their truthful outburst (admonishment) had more to do with a healing process taking place within them and that, in a curious way what was shared actually precipitated my own.  I felt very uncomfortable after hearing what was said because it negatively reflected on the job I did of raising a family.  According to this person, "ours was no family"  and proceeded to describe another family that they considered more worthy of being called a family (other than the one they grew up in).  "Okay, I get it".  I was also made painfully aware of how this individual felt while they were growing up--disconnected somehow, a tiny and distant little satellite orbiting earth, occasionally retrieved for preventive maintenance and then flung back into deep, dark space, all alone once again, looking tearfully down for help and reassurance asking, "is anyone there?" to which they received little or no answer.  This is the part that really got me.  If I had taken more time to talk and ask how they were feeling while they were growing up, "did they have any questions or any problems,  anything bothering them", maybe I could have gotten by with not feeling so rotten but this was not to be the case.  Understandably, I was now in for some serious reflection and soul searching.   And now that I've had some time to let all this sink in, I'm actually glad it happened.  This has really hit me hard and caused me not only to take a look at how I conducted myself in my role as a mother, but at all the other families out there who have no time for their kids, no time to talk over dinner, no time to do anything because it's all hurry, hurry, hurry, deadlines and timelines.  I have to ask, does it matter how rich or how poor a "family" you're born into is as both have some really serious drawbacks.  I would have to say that most if not all kids are being deprived of growing up under the most healthy and hospitable conditions.  And when you really take the time to look at this problem, under a microscope, you come to the same conclusion I have.

We all need to do some serious soul searching as to what our roles our, our responsibilities are as parents, teachers and mentors.

Our kids are depending on us.